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Panel Round Two

BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We're playing this week with Jessi Klein, Brian Babylon and Roy Blount, Jr. And here again is your host at the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago, Peter Sagal.

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Thank you, Bill. Thank you so much. Everybody, in just a minute, Bill reveals his favorite NPR personality is Linda Wertheimer.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: It's our Listener Limerick Challenge game. That's what I'm talking about. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. Roy, a hot new trend has been sweeping America's grocery stores. Your local supermarket now offers you the chance to do what while you shop.

ROY BLOUNT, JR.: Eat.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: That would be nice.

BLOUNT, JR.: Yeah.

SAGAL: Just open a bag of something and snack.

BLOUNT, JR.: I don't know. Can you give me a hint?

SAGAL: I sure can, Roy. It's hard to read your shopping list when you're seeing double.

BLOUNT, JR.: Drinking.

SAGAL: Yes.

BLOUNT, JR.: Oh, yeah.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL RINGING)

SAGAL: They're allowing you to drink. Grocery store chains coast to coast have been adding bars inside their stores and cup holders in the carts.

JESSI KLEIN: Oh.

BRIAN BABYLON: Oh, they have that at the Whole Foods here or that annoying one where they have the canoe slip. They let you take your canoe to the Whole Foods.

KLEIN: What?

BABYLON: Oh, I saw it. It was the worst thing I ever saw.

(LAUGHTER)

BABYLON: A lady rode a canoe up to this Whole Foods, and she had those feet shoes. And she had her little...

(LAUGHTER)

BABYLON: She had her little tote bag.

KLEIN: Like with toes - separate toes.

BABYLON: I was, oh, this is the worst thing ever.

SAGAL: That's true, though, in terms of - it is, in fact, Whole Foods that does this. There's a Whole Foods in Texas, for example, that you can buy a bucket of, quote, "walking-around beers" as you shop.

(LAUGHTER)

KLEIN: Really?

SAGAL: For a dollar each, which, by Whole Foods standards, is free.

(LAUGHTER)

BABYLON: Walking-around beer.

SAGAL: Walking-around beer.

BABYLON: That's south Texas.

KLEIN: I like that.

SAGAL: Yeah, but is it really going to help the shopping experience to see some drunk guy touching all the melons.

(LAUGHTER)

KLEIN: The drunk guy is usually touching all the melons.

SAGAL: That's true.

BLOUNT, JR.: Long as it's organic beer.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: So drinking while grocery shopping - it sounds like fun. Just make sure you get out of there by closing time because then you'll have to take, you know, the ugliest bunch of bananas home.

(LAUGHTER)

KLEIN: Well, I would definitely end up taking home, like, a lot more - like, just impulse - like, Yeah, I think I need chocolate frosting.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Yeah.

KLEIN: Oh, yeah, frosting.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Roy, Donald Trump has bragged over the years about how much he's given to charity - millions and millions, he says. But The Washington Post has been unable to find any evidence of this. Finally, though, this week, the Post found out that Donald Trump had donated to a cancer charity, but it turns out - well, what?

BLOUNT, JR.: Turns out that it was a pro-cancer society.

(LAUGHTER)

BLOUNT, JR.: Maybe I'm being unfair, I mean...

SAGAL: No, I don't think you are, but that's not the answer.

SAGAL: Oh.

SAGAL: It was a legitimate - very generous donation to a legitimate and worthwhile charity.

BLOUNT, JR.: But, I mean, he...

SAGAL: By Donald Trump.

BLOUNT, JR.: By Donald Trump. It was - well, what could be wrong?

SAGAL: Well, we assume this guy's middle name is not that.

BLOUNT, JR.: His middle name is not...

SAGAL: No.

BLOUNT, JR.: Oh, it's the wrong Donald Trump.

SAGAL: Exactly. It was another Donald Trump...

BLOUNT, JR.: Different Donald.

BLOUNT, JR.: ...Who gave the donation. The Post has been trying for months to find out what charitable donations Donald Trump has given and to whom. And the answer, as far as I can tell, has been nothing to no one. Mainly, his charitable contributions that he claims are free rounds of golf at his country clubs, leading to lots of hungry children trying to eat golf balls. So imagine The Post's relief when they found that a Donald Trump had given thousands to a cancer charity, but it's not the famous Donald J. Trump. It's Dr. Donald L. Trump, who goes by the nickname Skip.

(LAUGHTER)

BLOUNT, JR.: That's what they call him - Skip Trump.

BLOUNT, JR.: Skip Trump.

BLOUNT, JR.: A generous person and a good idea.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: We are pleased to say that we are joined by him now. Dr. Trump, Welcome to WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME.

DONALD L TRUMP: Thank you very much.

SAGAL: Well, first of all...

(APPLAUSE)

BABYLON: Hey, it's Skip. It's Skip Trump.

KLEIN: Yeah.

SAGAL: So I have to ask you - you've been named Donald J. Trump - excuse me. You've named Donald L. Trump, right?

TRUMP: Yes, sir.

SAGAL: Right - for your whole life.

TRUMP: Yep.

SAGAL: Have you forgiven your parents yet?

(LAUGHTER)

TRUMP: Absolutely. I'm named after my father, who was Donald L. Trump, so we're fine.

SAGAL: Really. Oh, OK. And there's no relation to the Donald Trump in the news.

TRUMP: No, none that I can determine.

SAGAL: Right. And so what has - has this been an issue for you your whole life 'cause Donald Trump has been famous since...

TRUMP: Well, not my whole life, but for a long time because he has been well-known for a long time.

SAGAL: Yeah. And do you have a rote answer for people when you tell them your name?

TRUMP: Yes. I say, yes, I am really Donald Trump.

SAGAL: Right.

(LAUGHTER)

TRUMP: But you can call me Skip.

SAGAL: There you are.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Has being - has carrying the name Donald Trump ever gotten you anything, like dinner table reservations or special treatment?

TRUMP: Absolutely not.

SAGAL: Really?

TRUMP: Nope.

SAGAL: When you call up and say, this is Donald Trump, and I would like a table, Applebee's says, you'll have to wait with everybody else.

(LAUGHTER)

TRUMP: Usually, they laugh.

SAGAL: Oh, really?

TRUMP: And say, no, you're not.

SAGAL: Really? Has anybody like approached you - let's say Newt Gingrich - wanting to be your vice president?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Or out-of-work Slovenian models looking for a leg up?

(LAUGHTER)

TRUMP: None of those - none of those called either.

SAGAL: All right. One last question, sir. Describe your hair.

(LAUGHTER)

TRUMP: Short and brown.

SAGAL: Short and brown and ruly? It doesn't seem like it.

TRUMP: It's fairly ruly. Yes.

SAGAL: OK. I'm glad to hear it. Dr. Trump, thank you for your good work, your donations, and thank you for joining us.

(APPLAUSE)

TRUMP: Pleasure to be here. Thank you.

SAGAL: Bye-bye. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by an NPR contractor. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio record.

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